*Bang*………..Ow.
A German citizen recently found a bullet lodged in the back of his head. The thing is… the bullet itself isn’t recent. The man was shot five years ago, in the midst of a New Years rejoicing. Local police say that the bullet was probably a stray, shot while celebrating. This man gives a whole new meaning to “late reaction”.
“I swear officer! I thought it was the Hilton Hotel!”
This is news so big, that I’m sure CNN would interrupt a presidential election race for it. Paris Hilton is almost murdered! Nah, I’m just kidding. But seriously, a man was recently arrested at six in the morning outside of her six-million dollar, five bedroom mansion. (Four rooms for her sex tapes and one for stashing the pot that she wasn’t caught with.) Paris had heard banging on her windows, and when she looked at her security monitors, she saw this man in her lawn, wielding two large knives. She actually had the chance to tweet a picture of him while he was being arrested, at which point, the man probably had a knee-buckling orgasm. She should be flattered.From Twitter: “Chad Ochocinco shouldn’t be tweetin right now, but Chad Ochocinco is!”
Last Friday during a game against the Philadelphia Eagles, Chad Ochocinco, wide receiver for the
Cincinnati Bengals, was fined for the usage of twitter during a game. The rules that the NFL has placed say that players and coaches may not use personal electronic equipment 90 minutes before a game or during a game. His tweets were sent at 6:50pm and 9:53pm. Kickoff was at 8:00pm. After the game, Ochocinco apologized for his $25,000 tweet via, you guessed it, twitter. If I had bentecinco thousand bucks to blow on a twitter message like Ochocinco, I’d use it to buy off “Ochouno” off the team.
Cincinnati Bengals, was fined for the usage of twitter during a game. The rules that the NFL has placed say that players and coaches may not use personal electronic equipment 90 minutes before a game or during a game. His tweets were sent at 6:50pm and 9:53pm. Kickoff was at 8:00pm. After the game, Ochocinco apologized for his $25,000 tweet via, you guessed it, twitter. If I had bentecinco thousand bucks to blow on a twitter message like Ochocinco, I’d use it to buy off “Ochouno” off the team.
